Are You Ready For Some Full-Contact, Team-Oriented Ball Sport Playing?

Oh yes indeedy ladies and gentlemen, it’s finally here! Yes, that’s right, the new album from Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz, Whaaat!!! Okaaay!!! (Madacy Records)!!!! Awwwww hellllll yeaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh boyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Read the rest of this entry »

What Not To Do In An Interview

Now that I’ve been given the big promotion up to Assistant General Manager Operations Manager, one of my current responsibilities is finding an intelligent, capable, hard worker to take over my old job. I’ve conducted a couple of interviews now, and after yesterday’s I feel I’m perfectly qualified to give potential job-seekers some interview tips. As much as I’d like to call out yesterday’s interviewee by name, it’s probably not a good idea so instead I’ll refer to him as Smarmy Christian Private School Prick.

Here now, some suggestions on what not to do in a job interview:

1) Don’t show up without a tie on. If you can’t find it in yourself to do this one simple thing, how are you ever going to be capable of obeying my every whim? Seriously, though, guys out there, if you’re going to an interview WEAR A TIE. I can’t stress this enough.

2) When filling out the initial employment application, don’t bitch, piss, and moan to my receptionist that it’s “tedious” and “unbelievable” we’d have the audacity to conduct a background check on you before offering the position.

3) When asked what you’ve been doing since you graduated from college, don’t reply with “Oh, y’know… hanging out… keeping it real.”

4) When asked what kind of job responsibilities you’d like, don’t answer, “I wanna do stuff that doesn’t bore me.”

5) When asked what your salary requirements are, don’t tell me how much you want to make and justify that amount by saying “‘Cause thats what all graduates like me are making out of college,” because son, you’re wrong. In fact, you’re not even close.

Finally, and absolutely most importantly:

6) When asked what kind of skills you developed in your last job, don’t answer, “I learned how not to manage Mexicans.” (emphasis most emphatically mine)

Idiot.

DAve

A (Work)night Out… Seriously

So I broke my normal Monday night routine of being a pathetic waste of couch-goo last night and went out with a couple friends (some old, some new) for the good ol’ standby dinner-and-a-movie. Dinner at the Bridgetown Grill (try the jerk chicken sandwich and don’t try to eat the little green pepper slices they give you in one bite), followed by Batman Begins at the Fox Theatre. I mean, the Fabulous Fox Theatre. Any theatre with an Arabian-landscape curtain, a glorious nightscape of stars painted on its ceiling, and bathrooms one could easily get lost in and it must be regarded as “fabulous”. Of course, this is Midtown and “fabulous” no doubt gets tossed around quite regularly around here. If you know what I mean.

Anyway, I hadn’t been to the Fox since I saw Pearl Jam there on their Vs. tour back in… eh… a while ago, and I forgot what a cool vibe the place gives off. We joined the organ player in rousing singalongs of old classics like “Georgia On My Mind”, “Take Me Out To the Ballgame” (second line, “take me out to the park“? Eh?) and a splendidly delightful medley of “Gin And Juice”, “(Ain’t No Fun) If Tha Homies Can’t Have None”, and “California Love”. We reveled in the timeless antics of Woody Woodpecker (there should be a law that every film is preceded by a cartoon).

The movie itself was really good - I’m not a huge Batman fan (I was more of a G.I. Joe/Transformers guy back in the day), but the whole backstory was really well laid-out, and was my favorite part of the movie. The movie (not just this one, but most of this genre) got bogged down with the introduction of the villain’s nefarious plot to throw Gotham into riotous chaos. I guess because the bad guys could’ve easily just bought a nuclear weapon with a lot less trouble than what he actually did. Nevertheless a great movie.

And great company.

DAve