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February 14, 2005

Happy Charles' Birthday, Everyone!

Once again we come to that day that so clearly cleaves the teeming throngs into two distinct camps... I'm speaking, of course, of Charles' birthday.

On one side we have the couples, the nauseatingly cutesy folk who celebrate my beloved brother's birthday by kowtowing to card companies and lavishing cards (they'll be in the trash in a week), candy (it'll give you cavities) and flowers (dead in three days, all of them) upon one another. These sickening people spend today in a blissful haze, light of foot and filled with song, gleefully anticipating the final few hours of Charles' birthday at which time they'll likely have fantastic, hot, sweaty sex.

I hate them.

On the other side are the singles. They'll spend the rest of the day toasting to one of the three best bros in the entire world. They'll raise a glass and drink. Over and over. A lot. If they're anything like me they'll also put on a little TooL and sing along:

My compassion is broken now.
My will is eroded,
and my desire stolen and it makes me feel ugly.
I'm on my knees and burning.
My piss and moans are the fuel that set my head on fire.
So smell my soul burning.
I'm broken, looking up to see the enemy.
I have swallowed the poison you feed me ...
but I survive on it,
and it leaves me guilt fed, hatred fed, weakness fed..
and I feel ugly, and dead inside.

Shit adds up at the bottom.

Either way, it's all for you... Happy Birthday Chuk.

Posted by DAve at February 14, 2005 05:55 PM

Comments

Posted by: Josh Massey at February 15, 2005 11:28 PM

Posted by: Josh Massey at February 16, 2005 04:04 PM