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June 23, 2005
286 Congressmen need to reread the Constitution
Amendment I:
Congress shall make no law ... abridging the freedom of speech...
It doesn't get much clearer than that. That's what makes this vote so ridiculous. Abso-friggin-lutely ridiculous.
Remember: the First Amendment is in place to protect unpopular speech because, by definition, popular speech needs no protection.
Good to see my Texas homeboy voting "nay", though. Ronnie needs to run for President.
June 13, 2005
photos.daveakins.com
It's a new thing 'round these parts. I know I tried the pic-a-day thing a while back and failed miserably, but this time I'm more motivated since I bought a new digital camera.
Check it out here.
June 09, 2005
Now, I'm No Fuddy-Duddy...
But methinks the folks at AJC.com (the Atlanta Journal-Constitution website) have gone a little too far when it comes to what they consider "entertainment".
Prepare Thyself, World, For Thy Face Is About To Be Rocked
Last night at trivia had a vibe to it... like something was going to happen. You could feel it in the air. Little things kept happening that seemed to portend bigger things to come. I forgot my wallet. A drunk girl brilliantly explained how she was a fantastic singer because she played clarinet in middle school and her dad was tall. But what did it all mean?
What it meant was, the Miller Lite Girls were in the house, raffling off quite a kickass prize. And after obediently buying a pitcher of Miller Lite (twist my arm) and receiving raffle tickets, and having Trivia Guru Bobby read one of my tickets' numbers, it all fell into place.
World, prepare to have thine face rocked.
I won an electric guitar.
Oh, but not just any electric guitar, mind you. Oh no...
I won an o-riginal, 2005 edition, First Act Overtone, complete with Miller Lite polished-gold inlay sticker slapped right there on the front.
An original First Act Overtone, you say? Impossible, you say? Au contraire, I say:
The First Act Overtone has long held court in the kingdom of Supreme Guitar Asskickery, right alongside the Fender Strat and the Gibson Les Paul. But the Overtone, unlike it's cousins-in-rock, takes it even further, because only it comes nestled neatly inside what heretofore shall be known as The Greatest Packaging Of All Time...
Bow before the First Act Overtone box. Shield thine eyes from it's blazing splendor. One need look no farther than the Rock God right there on TGPAT to know that this isn't your ordinary guitar. This mofo has rocked the face off the universe so hard, he turned everything, save the guitar, pure black and white. And with his Overture slung across him like former governor Jesse Ventura toted that big badass gatling cannon in Predator, no one, not even those lucky enough to survive the blast of that first E chord, no one will ever notice the large bald spot on top of his head.
You may also notice the First Act Overtone is "seen on TV". This proves it's the greatest guitar of all time. You ever see an ad for a Les Paul on TV? I rest my case.
I was ecstatic. But after getting my new baby home I realized: "Oh god, what about an amp? Will I not be able to start my world domination without one? Well, ladies and gents, the First Act people thought of that. And to my delight, they included, you guessed it, an amplifier right there in the box with the guitar! And it only needs two 9-volt batteries! Not only that, but it brings portability to a whole new level (Han Solo included for reference):
Unbelievable! I've had pieces of stool larger than that! But the amp, like the guitar, will not be denied in it's mission to assist me in global rock brainfuckery.
Prepare thyself, world. Prepare thyself.
June 04, 2005
Can't Sleep
I'm supposed to be waking up in a little over six hours for golf. Early rise on a Saturday, but it wasn't supposed to be this early. My sleeping patterns have been a bit wierd lately; I'll get home from work and sleep from 7-9 or something. Despite this, I never unintentionally wake up in the middle. Actually that's not accurate. I do in fact wake up relatively regularly (but only once a night) but it's just long enough to trod to the fridge for a quick nip of ginger ale and then back to sleep. Not tonight it seems.
Speaking of which... Sunkist doesn't have the same refreshing *aaaah* at weird hours of the night that ginger ale does. Nothing does, in fact. Last time I was at Kroger I decided to shirk the Big K Ginger Ale (only 53 cents with your Kroger Plus Card!) for a 2-liter of Sunkist and a 2-liter of Mountain Dew. Why I don't know. Both are too sugary and both, as I mentioned before, lack the sufficient *aaah* factor. I think it's because of the syrup. Ginger ale goes down smooth but Sunkist has that "thickness" like milk or OJ that kinda clings to the back of your throat and instead of making you fall back asleep it makes you want to hock loogies over your patio railing.
Maybe this is why I don't write more to my site... Do I do my best work in the wee hours? Don't answer that.
I've returned with a glass of water. Especially nice are those trips to the kitchen in the aforementioned wee hours that culminate in a meeting with Blattodea fervently searching for silverware to lick before scurrying underneath the microwave.
I can feel decision-time coming on... Try to go back to sleep? Try to introduce Mr. Cockroach to Mr. Flat Surface Of A Bed, Bath And Beyond catalog? Try to find that secret chord that David played which pleased the Lord?
Here goes nothin'...
